You Can’t Hide From Your Feelings
The following is a guest post from Amber Moss.
Feel your feelings.
That is it.
Really, that is the only thing you should always be doing.
I don’t care if they are hard.
I don’t care if they hurt.
I don’t care if they drain the life out of you and cause you to break out in hives.
I don’t care because I care about you.
Let me digress. I will give you a little side step.
Stay with me.
You Cannot Pick And Choose
People who want to lose a few pounds might stop eating chemicals and start eating nutrition.
This is an awesome deal. And it works. But what they find is that along with the weight-stress, disease, and inflammation drop off as well.
Because you cannot selectively heal using nutrition.
You cannot simply say, “I want this real, nutrient dense food to ONLY make me lose weight.”
It does not work that way. You feed your body properly, you heal all over.
It is an amazing system.
Likewise, you cannot selectively destroy.
If you want to eat chemicals and empty calories because you do not mind having a little extra sass in your ass, then great.
But these same people seem suddenly surprised when they get a diabetes diagnoses from their doctor. They did not have the ability to decide what they want to suffer from in order to eat whatever they want.
This is not how it works.
Now, let’s talk about those feelings.
The ones you try so hard to hide from.
You Cannot Hide From Your Feelings
We do just about anything we can to avoid feeling a hard feeling.
We over-drink, over-work, over-eat, over-analyze and over-blame (I do not even know if that is a thing, but I know a few people who fit the definition, if one exists).
For a while.
It distracts us.
If you find it challenging to feel your feelings, you have a buffet of options to distract you.
But it comes at a price.
Just like you cannot selectively heal, you cannot selectively numb.
You cannot decide just to numb the parts that hurt and feel the parts that are amazing.
It does not work that way.
So let me tell you again, and listen closely.
Feel Your Feelings
Feel all of them.
Feel them hard.
Don’t give me your pansy excuses about how bad it hurts.
Of course it hurts, there is a reason for it, and yes, it may suck, but that is not a reason to stop.
Suck it up and stop resisting.
Because when something fantastic comes around, and it will, you deserve to feel every damn bit of it to its fullest extent.
Don’t you dare rob yourself of that.
Don’t you dare numb yourself from feeling the amazing parts of life.
You suffered through the crap and you get to feel the magic.
Unless you take it away from you by trying to numb.
And why would you do that?
You’re Worth It
Do you not think you are worth the work? Worth the hard? Worth evolving through the pain?
Because you are.
You are worth it.
The pain is temporary.
It will introduce you to yourself.
It is easier to feel your feelings than it is to un-numb yourself.
So if you are numbing yourself to avoid work- you are in for a surprise.
You just knocked your work into level: Overdrive.
And managed to rob yourself and all the great things you could be feeling.
You managed to rob yourself from evolving.
So how do you successfully feel your feelings without drowning in them?
First you should know that resisting the big, bad feelings actually gives them more power.
Have you ever braced yourself for a dentist appointment? Spend the entire day dreading it? Did you think about all the ways the pain would come? Only to leave your cleaning appointment feeling mildly sore but minty fresh?
The time you spent trying to avoid the dentist and the time you spent thinking of how bad it would be was worse than your time in the chair.
Stop spending your life dreading and distracting and do the damn thing already.
Sit down and think about that hard feeling.
Sit with it.
Describe how it courses through your body.
Journal about it. Tell yourself you are choosing to feel this right now.
It is not happening to you, you are not a victim. You are allowing it.
And when you start to see the light, smile.
Say hi to your new self.
And get ready to feel all the fantastic things in ways you never thought possible.
And then sit with it.
Marvel in it.
This is what you worked for.
And you deserve it.
I am Amber Moss, a coach, author and creator
I am married mommy to three imaginative kiddos. I home school, drink tea in slightly excessive amounts, read often, and I live in a camper while traveling the US with my family.
I can be found at www.ambermosslifecoach.com
One of the best ways to get in touch with your feelings is to take up meditation. If you’re not sure how check out Meditation For Beginners