Do you ever find yourself going to bed and being unable to sleep because the events of the day are replaying themselves in your head in an endless loop? Is this usually worse during times when things are not going quite to plan or you are under higher levels of stress than is normally the case?
This is a common problem for many people and it can be very frustrating not to mention tiring when half the night is spent trying to switch off your thoughts with little or no relief.
There is a process that I use with clients that can help in times like this. I must say at this time that if you suffer from long term insomnia then it may be wise to consult with a medical doctor, this process is only designed to help with short term problems mainly brought on by worry.
Firstly, we need to have to hand a journal or diary. If you haven’t got one I would encourage you buy one because we need to be writing stuff down.
Think of the day and any events that didn’t go quite as you would have wished. When you have thought of at least one thing write it down. If there is more than one thing, great! You can learn even more than you anticipated, write them all down.
Then think of lessons that you can learn from them. What could you have done differently? What could you change next time? Think really hard. If we can learn from our mistakes then they are worth committing, it is only when we refuse to learn from them and repeat them ad nauseum that they become like millstones round our neck.
Write down as many things as possible, but be sure to write them down in a positive manner. It is very important during this exercise to be kind to yourself it is not an excuse to beat yourself up. We ALL make mistakes it is a part of being human; it is how we react to them that separate the successful from the also-rans.
Now that you have the errors and the lessons written down, think of some things that you did well. I don’t care how big or small they are; you will have done some things well so write at least 2 down. It may simply have been getting to work on time or cooking a pleasant dinner or something much more impressive, it doesn’t really matter what it is just write it down whilst mentally telling yourself well done!
The final stage is the easiest of the lot. Underline the page. That day is done you can underline it and forget about it, consign it to history because that is what it is you can no longer influence it.
There is an addendum to this process that can be useful if you are worrying about things that you have to do the following day. Write them down too. The moment you commit to paper that which needs to be done, you send a message to your unconscious that it will get done that you wont forget about it and that you can now enjoy a good nights sleep.
Mistakes, obviously, show us what needs improving. Without mistakes, how would we know what we had to work on? – Peter McWilliams
Tim Brownson is a Certified Life Coach and has been unsticking people and helping them reach their true potential since 2005. If you would like to know how he can help you