Comments on: How Can I Be More Confident?

By: Doug

Doug — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 19:45:04 +0000

Tim,

Thanks a lot. Now you have me doubting my doubts!!

;>)

H should meet my brother’s sister-in-law. She’s a head nurse, too. They call her “the whip”. She has that same kind of control over others in her department, including the doctors. I’ve known her for a long, long time and she’s not that way outside of work.

Anchors. I guess sailors have an especially easy time with this confidence thing, right?

Dougs last blog post..Regions of the Great Hourglass

By: Tim Brownson

Tim Brownson — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 12:49:35 +0000

@ Cath – So son’t just like it, do it!

@ Charlie – I know what you mean, anchoring is as old as the hills. It’s just a matter of being aware of it and harnessing all that power.

@ Annie – I almost called the series The Trifecta Of Personal Development but couldn’t get the betting connotation out of my head from my horse racing days! I don’t mean I raced horses myself btw, they’d be much too quick for me, just that I used to watch horse racing and bet in my late teens and early twenties.

@ Doug – Are you sure you’re not confident? ;-)

@ Laurie – It’s never silly to feel nervous and it sounds like you did a brilliant self-coaching job, nice one.

@ Kelly – Hey you’re very welcome. I bet your friend had other areas of her life where she was equally confident.

BTW, I almost included a story about my wife who tends to lack confidence in some situations. Put her in a nurses uniform though and give her 20 nurses to look after and she is dynamite. I’ve seen her telling doctors to get off her ward, console grieving patients and be asked by seasoned doctors to help insert a hickman line because they couldn’t find a vein.

The uniform is the anchor, once that goes on she’s in charge. I’ve treid wearing it at the weekends just in case ;-)

By: Kelly

Kelly — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 03:21:07 +0000

Tim, I really liked this post because I actually haven’t thought of confidence in this way before. I had a conversation about a year ago with a friend when she was starting out in her new business. She was very nervous and scared about failing and couldn’t sleep at all. She asked me how I can muster the courage to take so many risks in my life, pointing to a couple of examples. On being a career change I made that resulted in me halving my income. I wasn’t sure what to tell her because the decisions she thought of as risky and adventurous, I had had the utmost confidence in. She then told me I was the most confident person she knew, which I found hysterical because I am all too aware of my insecurities. I brushed her off saying I can be full of bravado but most of the time I’m just as scared as everyone else.

But this article just made something click. I am supremely confident in some areas. Lots in fact. And I am equally insecure and neurotic in other areas. According to this, the key to having confidence in all areas is just to tap into where I have it and spread it to where i don’t. Sounds easy enough. Off to find out about anchoring now. I feel like I’m on a roll.

And thanks for the link love. I realise I’m a bit late to the party, but I’ve been busy re-doing my site this past week so haven’t been reading. I do appreciate the sharing of the love though, and glad I read this article since it could be characterised as a definite ‘lightbulb moment’ for me.

Thanks.

Kelly :)

By: Laurie

Laurie — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 03:15:31 +0000

I recently gave a presentation that was very important for the growth of my new business. I was extremely nervous which was silly since I have presented to adults so many times. This one was different because so much was riding on it. I decided to re-interpret the feelings I was having. Instead of seeing them as being anxious, I said to myself that these were feelings of excitement. It made a world of difference and I did a great job presenting. I even got a round of applause which doesn’t happen in this type of presentations.

By: Doug

Doug — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 21:55:42 +0000

Tim,

I could almost bring myself to try some of your suggestions above, but I just don’t have any confidence in my ability to make any of it work.

;>)

Good column, as usual.

Dougs last blog post..Regions of the Great Hourglass

By: Annie Binns

Annie Binns — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 20:18:47 +0000

I was digging the confidence boost from this article until I had to look up, “antipodean”. At least you saved it until the very end, by which point I was able to try anchoring my earlier confidence from not having to look up, “alacrity”; but then I realized that was just due to the fabulous horny-dog context and if you had said that Kelly was an alacritous blogger, I’d be back in the dictionary.

Dammit. Great post, can’t wait to finish the trifecta!

Annie Binnss last blog post..A Flattering of the Passions

By: Charlie

Charlie — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 14:20:42 +0000

Anchoring is a powerful technique. I’ve been doing it for quite some time without recognizing the technique had a name or was talked about, and it’s really changed my life for the better, I think. At its simplest, I remark to myself “I’ve done a lot of harder things than this well, so if I try to work through the learning curve, I will become good at this, too.” The rest is history…(or the future?).

Charlies last blog post..How I Overcame My Doubts About Coaching

By: Cath Lawson

Cath Lawson — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 03:50:28 +0000

Hi Tim – I like the idea of anchoring. I must admit – I feel really confident in some things, but the complete opposite when I have to do things I’m not used to doing.