Demystifying NLP

When I tell people I use NLP (Neurolingustic Programming) I often get either that glazed look normally associated with people when an elderly distant relative drops by uninvited and announces they have 3,000 photos of their recent visit to a Peruvian basket weaving factory to show the entire family, and not to worry, because they’ve bought some Ox tongue sandwiches to keep everybody’s energy up. Or a look of sheer terror as though they have just been cornered in an alleyway by a large air-breathing shark armed with an AK-47, a lasso and a bad case of halitosis. Either way, it seldom encourages me to pursue the conversation. Every now and then somebody will look mildly interested and I will take this as an invitation to go into more detail, much more detail, and I’ll whip up some tongue sandwiches for the long night ahead.

It seems to me that NLP has got either a bad rep, a good rep, or no rep at all. I know that looks like I’ve covered every conceivable option, so let me explain what I mean. I have never met anybody that has studied NLP that wasn’t glad they did. I’m sure there are such people out there; it’s just that I haven’t met them. In fact, I can’t even remember meeting anybody that didn’t think it was brilliant. I have done a practitioner course and two master practitioner courses as well as numerous one off workshops and the attendees always seem very happy to me. I expect the brain washing session on day one has something to do with that, but I’m sure it wasn’t the only reason.

At the opposite end of the spectrum there are the vast majority of people that say “NLP? Nope, never heard of it buddy, and no, I don’t want a sandwich” Then there’s the third group. The ‘a little knowledge is a dangerous thing’ group. These people have heard of NLP, read two articles on the Internet and now know it’s the devils play thing. As such, I am seen to be one of Lucifer’s helpers and probably have a pointy tail tucked into my pants. The latter may or may not be true, but I have never visited or even had an e-mail from the Prince of Darkness, unless that is, he’s trying to sell me products to enhance my manhood, goes by the name of Glatter and lives in Poland, which quite frankly I doubt, because it’s too damn cold for him.

NLP suffers because it’s a huge umbrella term that consists of many different techniques and processes. Some, like the fast phobia cures and removing of fears can seem weird to people that don’t understand how they work. Imagine you have been in therapy for years with emotional issues and an NLP Practitioner says “Worry not kind sir/lady, I can sort you out in half an hour, once I’ve remembered where I put my cloak and top hat” You’re likely to be skeptical and I don’t blame you. Not that I’m suggesting NLP can cure everything, of course it can’t, but it’s brilliant at doing some things very quickly and very effectively that counseling and therapy may not be so useful for.

There are other areas of NLP that are much more mundane and focus round the use of language. This is the bit that I like the best because I can use it on a daily basis with clients and not have crosses waved in my face. You may find it a tad suspicious that a man who butchers the English language with the kind of gay abandon you’d normally associate with a bunch of very drunk lemmings off on a hang gliding expedition studies the English language, but it’s true.

NLP is very misunderstood by a lot of people, some of whom actually practice it. I want to take a stab over the next couple of weeks, or until I get bored, at demystifying it. I’ll look at some processes like anchoring, submodalities and phobia cures etc, as well as using it to help aid communication. If you have no idea about NLP and what it can offer and want to expand your horizons this should be a good starting point. By the end you can make your own mind up on whether you think it would be useful in your life or not, and I promise to leave the brain washing to one side.

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2 Comments So Far.

Comment by montdor1 on 6 July 2008:

I loved your wit and writing skill; but I wanted at least a pocket explanation, a little one, of NLP. Could you provide one? I’m no big,skeptic, but most things that seem easy (1/2 hour to cure “x”) are honestly, not intentionally, missing something very big. CBT is kind of funny. It apparently has two meanings as an acronym. You know the first.
Comment by Tim Brownson on 7 July 2008:

@ montdor1 - There’s a whole series in here if you click on the NLP link under categories. If you have any specific questions let me know and I’ll do what I can either via e-mail or in a post.