Comments on: 10 Surefire Ways To Get A Date

By: Alex

Alex — Sun, 03 Jan 2010 00:28:07 +0000

Hey Tim, thanks for your reply. In my experience I’ve found the rapport building to be really great when you’re already in a relationship, I think you do have to be careful with how much you choose to build rapport and alikeness in the initial stages of dating though.

By: Tim Brownson

Tim Brownson — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 23:51:41 +0000

@ Alex – To be honest, no I have never used this stuff to attract a women as I was married when I learned it and I still am.

It’s really rapport building 101 and will work a lot of the time.

By: Alex

Alex — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 05:12:10 +0000

This is a really interesting post Tim and I’m wondering what level of success you’ve actually had with these techniques for dates. After I learned NLP it was impossible for me to get dates for months until I realized what I was doing wrong.

I used to get all these women interested in befriending me because I was mirroring them and I couldn’t figure out why they weren’t attracted to me but suddenly thought I was their best friend instead. A while ago I started intentionally breaking rapport, not doing what they were doing on purpose (i.e. if she leans back, I leaned forward, doing the opposite). I had much more luck with this. By not creating rapport you seem to make yourself stand out in a way and build attraction like that. It seems easier for you to get the upper hand and have the opposite sex ‘chase’ you when you’re creating that sense of distance subconsciously.

However I can certainly see how pacing as a stepping stone to leading could come in handy. It’s still something I’m experimenting with, but one thing I’ve learned for sure is that rapport is not always the best thing (it’s not something you should always do automatically in every social situation as it could cause less good than intended).

By: Troy McClure

Troy McClure — Sun, 15 Mar 2009 18:40:10 +0000

You may remember me from such films as “Smoking your way thin”, and “Get confident stupid!”

Confidence is key. Women want a confident man.

By: Tim Brownson

Tim Brownson — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 17:55:52 +0000

@ Duff – That’s a great point about breaking rapport and not something that ever crossed my mind when writing the article. Sometimes as you pint out that it can be as important to break it quickly. Thanks for pointing that out.

By: 131 Star Bloggers and Their Best Posts | Catherine Lawson

131 Star Bloggers and Their Best Posts | Catherine Lawson — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 01:28:57 +0000

[...] He’s also written a guest post on this blog. Here’s a couple of Tim’s articles: 10 Surefire Ways To Get A Date and How To Change Your Attitude. Kathy of Virtual Impax offers exceptional marketing tools for [...]

By: Duff

Duff — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 22:26:01 +0000

Rapport is a classic and important topic in NLP. It goes deep too, when you really get into what helps people to make a change.

Just as key a skill is learning how to break rapport. For example, when a creepy dude approaches you on the street and asks for drugs or money, or when a relative attempts to provoke a political fight, etc.

By: Tim Brownson

Tim Brownson — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 11:24:55 +0000

@ Dave – Thanks for the feedback Dave and of course I realize that you are only here for research purposes so no worries there.

That’s an interesting one ‘Icebreakers’ I’ll give it some thought and see whether I think it ties in with what I’m doing. The only problem is I was bloody useless with stuff like that when I was younger. I once tried ‘Get your coat you’ve pulled’ but it just induced fits of laughter – and not in a good way.