Ways To Be Miserable

Posted on 15 August 2008

Too many people believe that being miserable is difficult. This video post will show you that with a bit of heard work you too can be as miserable as sin. On the other hand, if you’re one of those weirdo’s that wants to be happy, you could do just the opposite of what I suggest.

The eagle eyed of you will spot that there are two number sevens and a complete absence of a number 9. I wasn’t being 9ist honest, I just lost count. Hence the reason I’m a life coach and not an accountant.
It’s a bit rough and ready with the editing (and some would say the delivery too), but I hope you can use it to bring some serious misery into your life.

It was filmed in High Def but unfortunately I had all sorts of problems uploading to YouTube that I have never encountered before, so I’ve had to drop the res. The good news though is that it’ll now play on an iPhone. Hurrah!

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49 Comments So Far.

Comment by Vered on 15 August 2008:

My favorite: become a martyr.
Very common with moms. Very effectively leads to misery.
Comment by Laurie on 15 August 2008:

LOL! I think other folks should do what I have done and have their crazy in-laws move three houses up the street so you can complain about how they intrude in your life all the time and how your father-in-law walks outside in either his boxers or his unzipped shorts (he doesn’t wear underware under them)!

Also when someone asks you “how ya doing/” your standard replay should be “ohhh not good at all!”
Comment by Anja Merret on 15 August 2008:

Very funny. Probably way above the heads of all the miserable people out there, regrettably!
Comment by Aaron - Today is that Day on 15 August 2008:

HAHAHA! Classic stuff, Tim! I’m gonna run right out now and start becoming more miserable. I’ve just been WAY too happy lately! ;)~
Comment by Tim Brownson on 16 August 2008:

@ Vered - Yep, that described my mom to a tee!

@ Laurie - I had my in-laws here for 3 weeks in March. Nice people but there were a few frayed nerves by the end.

@ Anja - Yep that’s the downside to it.

@ Aaron - Yeh, snap to it bud, I did detect a little bit too much happiness with your move to the coast. A tip would be to start worrying about Hurricanes. That can help stop them I’m told.
Comment by Daniel Richard on 16 August 2008:

LOL. Resist the urge on being upstart and positive! Dang this 8 mins made me moving towards the miserable side.
Comment by Dr. KC/DOCintheBiz on 16 August 2008:

Tim,

This video not only shows off your amazing charisma and presentation skills, it’s so imformative and draws the viewer in until it’s over before he/she even knows it! Bravo!!

I love the way you show what we need NOT to do if we want to be happy. Showing how to be miserable is such a wonderfully unique way to get the message of how to be happy with more than a few giggles!

Thank you!
Doc KC
Comment by Tim Brownson on 16 August 2008:

@ Daniel - Glad to help you on your way to a life time of misery. Remember though, it’s no overnight fix ;-)

@ Doc KC - Aw shucks, I’m all embarrassed now! Thanks for the kind words.
Comment by pete swaile on 16 August 2008:

Tim, as ever highly amusing. Loads of great ways to be thoroughly miserable. Not sure i’ll use any myself but very handy to pass onto people who are too happy!!
Comment by ZaggedEdge on 17 August 2008:

Hey tim, i’m rarely miserable, but once in a while, i’ll use some of your tips!!
Comment by Lyman Reed on 17 August 2008:

Thanks for this, Tim. I thought that I was good at being miserable before, but if I use your tips, I really think I can bring it to the next level! :)

Oops, sorry about the smiley… I guess I do need to work on this more…
Comment by Breian Malupa - Breian.com on 17 August 2008:

LOL. Great vid, you made my day :)
Comment by Ali on 17 August 2008:

Great stuff and very funny! I agree with Vered that “become a martyr” is an insidious trap: it doesn’t help you, and your kids/aged parents/spouse etc probably wish you wouldn’t too. I love the George Bernard Shaw quote “She lived for others; you could tell the others by their haunted expression.”
Comment by Tim Brownson on 17 August 2008:

@ Pete - I know you mate and you’re way too happy. I really think you need to take some of this on board and bring yourself downa bit. Life’s not meant to be fun you know.

@ ZaggedEdge - Good for you, that’s what I like to hear. Try and implement a few more whenever you get a chance.

@ Lyman - I almost deleted your comment as spam when I saw that smiley. Don’t make me do that next time bud and I will if you come round here being happy and stuff like that. Don’t you realize that there’s a recession on?

@Breian - Thanks a lot for taking the trouble to comment

@ Ali - That GBS knew a thing or two eh? Congrats on your post on Problogger btw, absolutely brilliant advice for any aspiring blogger and I was surprised to see you not recognized at the top of the post.

Here’s the link for anybody wanting to up the traffic to their own blog. http://www.problogger.net/archives/2008/08/17/10-steps-to-the-perfect-list-post/
Comment by Rita on 17 August 2008:

WOW! What an amazing, amusing and authentic video! (I like alliteration - sue me.) BEING GUILTED - definitely. As I’ve stated before, I once heard an “expert psychologist” who was being honored in NYC, speak about how guilt is the ONLY human emotion that ONLY takes and NEVER gives. You want to make me miserable: guilt me into doing something!

Rita
Comment by Tom on 17 August 2008:

Tim, this is great! Nice use of video……
Comment by Dave Fowler on 18 August 2008:

Waaaaaaa Hahahahaha.

LMFAO.

“Well, yeah, I suppose that is funny for you, but you do realise there’s people in hospital that can’t laugh at the moment…

….It doesn’t really matter, just bring everybody down”

Fantastic advice.

I’ve got to watch it again now.
Comment by Tim Brownson on 18 August 2008:

@ Rita - If you don’t send more traffic my way the puppy gets it.

@ Tom - I seem to think it was you that first mentioned video posts to me! I’m really getting into them now.

@ Dave - It’s not a laughing matter Dave, and I thought you’d understand that. At least 6 cute kittens perished in the time it took my to type this reply. Think about that whilst you’re laughing your ass off.
Comment by Tom Volkar / Delightful Work on 18 August 2008:

LOL You really got me howling when you leaned into the camera for a closeup on Be Jealous! It was kind of scary though.
Comment by Rita on 18 August 2008:

Hey, Tim,

You are a cruel, cruel man. That’s why I keep coming back! Come on over to my “coffee” blog and weigh in. If your automated comments didn’t take up so much of my time responding to - lol - I’d have MORE TIME TO SEND PEOPLE OVER!

Rita
Comment by Tim Brownson on 18 August 2008:

@ Tom - Be afraid, be very afraid

@ Rita - I’ll be there, bear with me because I’m having to answer your answer to my answer.
Comment by Dave Fowler on 18 August 2008:

Hahahahaha.

I’ve just watched the video again. It was even funnier second time around.

I’m going to add this to my favourites and play it again the next time I’m being a miserable tool.

BTW, while I was writing MY reply at least SEVEN cute kittens perished. So there.

Dave
Comment by finfish on 22 August 2008:

I just couldn’t stop laughing brilliant!!!!!!!!!! Finfish
Comment by Tim Brownson on 22 August 2008:

@ finfish - Laughter’s alright, but I think you’re missing the point. If that ever happens again just remember that somewhere in the world a cute puppy dog just got hit by a big truck.
Comment by Dan - Personal Development Blog on 24 August 2008:

Hi Tim,

Great video - a wonderfully British way of making a point! Looking forward to reading your book now I’m back from holidays!

Cheers, Dan
Comment by Naomi Dunford on 24 August 2008:

Holy Christ on a bike that was funny. I’ll do my best to incorporate as many of these tips as soon as possible. Thank you, Tim, for the usual sage advice.
Comment by Tim Brownson on 25 August 2008:

@ Dan - Thanks and yeh, I guess it is a VERY British approach.

@ Naomi - Sage huh? I like that, I like being a giver of sage advice. Who knows, maybe one day I can charge for it?
Comment by Benjamin on 31 August 2008:

very very fun and cool. I heard Glenn Beck do something similar about collecting carbon. You guys are great!!!!!!
Benjamin
Comment by Rita on 31 August 2008:

Tim,

I had to take my daughter back to school today. Hence, I only got a few emails. That’s why I’m writing. So, thanks! I’m so lonely without my daughter that I’ll take even an automated email.

(Not that I’m trying to guilt you or anything.)

Oh - and btw: EVERYBODY GO TO TIM’S. HE’S A TRULY FUNNY AND INTELLIGENT MAN, NOT TO MENTION INCREDIBLY HANDSOME.

Hope I helped with “traffic!”

Rita :-)
Comment by Tim Brownson on 31 August 2008:

@ Tim - My autoresponder loves you. It often talks about you and says it would like to meet up for a cup of coffee (unlike me who can’t bloody drink coffee after midnight tonight for 28 days) and a chat, shall I arrange it?

Thanks for the traffic, that worked wonders.
Comment by Tim Brownson on 31 August 2008:

@ Benjamin - Thanks for the comment. Have you got a link for the Glenn Beck thing?
Comment by Rita on 31 August 2008:

Tim,

I am getting a bit concerned about you: you are answering your own comments. As you know, since you read my blog regularly, I have never tasted coffee. Perhaps you should drink just a wee bit less.

I hope that I have helped in generating a larger audience for you. I will continue to try to do so, as your blog REALLY deserves it, and I have much respect for you. (Hence, my concern about your coffee consumption and self-responses.)

If I may suggest one thing to you to increase trafffic flow: Please do NOT threaten poor, innocent puppies!

One way to increase traffic flow that I personally can offer you: each weekend I write a blog based on a “Reader’s Request.” All you have to do is send an idea to my Comments for a “weekend blog.” Is there something you’d like me to speak/write on? Is there something you would specifically like to know about R.D. (or R.)? Is there a fictional scenario that you would like to create, whereby I finish the story? Just ask! (And be mindful of the fact that every comment from you is moderated - lol.)

I REALLY am trying to help. I REALLY am concerned about you. Nonetheless, I must now go to my emails. I am quite concerned that I might miss one.

Please, take care of yourself. Your faithful - and growing - audience is counting on you to maintain both physical and mental health!

Cheers,

R.
Comment by Benjamin on 1 September 2008:

Tim, I was traveling around by car and caught him on the talk radio show. Perhaps that will help you get a link to the broadcast.
Benjamin
Comment by Laurie on 1 September 2008:

http://www.glenbeck.com

If you get on there you can find out where to listen. Tim, you will LOVE Glen Beck. He might just be more conservative then me. :O Is that possible? I dare you to listen and not explode!!!! It will probably drive you to drinking an alcoholic coffee drink whilst eating a steak being too full or drunk to exercise.

Go for it! I dare you!!
Comment by Tim Brownson on 1 September 2008:

@ Rita - I love you Rita I think we both know that, but the interesting fact is that I have no idea what you’re talking about half the time, and I like that in a fellow blogger! The key with answering yourself is that you are guaranteed to get the responses you really want. It’s a cunning plan. Thanks for the kind works and tons of traffic btw.

@ Benjamin and Laurie - Hmm, I had a quick check but that sites appears to be cyber sat. It’s all links and no real front end. I get the gist that he’s a Republican talk radio guy, but that really can’t be his home page??

PS. Just found it, you missed an ‘N’ off.

Er, yeh….not sure about that ;-)
Comment by Laurie on 1 September 2008:

Oh, my I did short ol’ Glenn his “n”. It should have been http://www.glennbeck.com

Thanks for noticing. I hope you enjoy Glenn. He is “right” minded (as it should be) ;O)
Comment by Charlie Gilkey on 2 September 2008:

This was truly an awesome video, Tim. I particularly like catastrophize - I think I’ll send that to my wife, as she’s prone to the hyperbolic.

I think I’m a good way along to being able to be mardy.
Comment by Rita on 2 September 2008:

Tom,

No problem…and thanks for visiting my blog. Love ya too!

Rita
Comment by Tim Brownson on 2 September 2008:

@ Laurie - Not tempted, sorry!

@ Charlie - Stick with the mardiness training, it takes dedication and focus.

@ Rita - Who the bloody hell’s Tom?
Comment by Melissa on 28 September 2008:

Wow, this was nothing short of brilliant.

Upon (”excruiatingly painful”…to catastrophize…) introspection, I find that I may be perilously close to the “be a martyr” way-to-be-miserable.

I’d love to hear “other people’s perspectives” on how a mother is NOT to put her child’s happiness first? …and at what age does this no longer become appropriate (since being a mother is a pretty much permanent condition)? My daughter is 26 and I almost always put her happiness above my own…at no small cost, I may tell you. But I don’t regret it or resent it - except in my funkiest moments of self-pity.

Speaking of which, I have a couple of suggestions that I would add to the list:
11. Wallow in self-pity (fortunately, I do this only rarely)
12. Isolate yourself from your community and society in general, as though you were a hermit or in the grip of agoraphobia. (Yeah…another one I’ve been guilty of from time to time…I took the whole ‘cocooning’ trend too much to heart.)
Comment by Eric Hamm on 15 October 2008:

Great video, Tim. I like the ‘1up people in conversation’ point. This is something I actually used to do myself. I never realized how annoying and selfish it was until I noticed others doing it.

You’ve got a great blog. I came upon it after reading your ‘post’ of a comment on Writer Dad’s guest post. :-) Eric.
Comment by Lori on 17 October 2008:

Tim you are my new hero. Your posts/videos are pretty insightful and funny. My hats off to you!
Comment by Tim Brownson on 17 October 2008:

@ Melissa - IMHO it is only a problem when it effects your own happiness and when you base your own pleasure on your kids alone. Helping them out at any age just fine and good if they want that help and you don’t see it (or them) as defining who you are as a person. Hope that makes sense and of course others may well disagree.

@ Eric - Thanks a lot I appreciate the feedback. At least you know you used to do it. The really great perpetrators do it an unconscious level with a delicious level of skill ;-)

@ Lori - Always happy to be a hero! LOL. Glad to have you here and if you let me have your URL I’ll make sure your link works because at the moment it doesn’t. Maybe you typed it in wrong?
Comment by Elli on 30 October 2008:

and what about 9?
7 ate 9.

Great stuff!

Cheers!
Comment by Sharon Wilson on 9 November 2008:

This is great! - especially the part about never being wrong!
Comment by Pentad on 10 November 2008:

Damn. Now, I see why I have had difficulty in reaching my misery goal. I forgot #2 and #7…hmmm. I wonder which celebrity I’ll go after.

Seriously, though. I’m not a Life Coach in the same way as yourself (have other training), but sometimes when I read all the positive blogs to be found out there, I do wonder if it is any longer human to have a “down”-day once in awhile??? I never seem to find posts that expresses that to people…you know, their normalcy.

By the way. I DO love your stuff, and I got a good laugh from the video. Thank you!!!!

Pentads last blog post..Celebration in The Rain Forest of Panama
Comment by Tim Brownson on 10 November 2008:

@ Pentad - Let me tell you I certainly have down days. In fact I’ve had one today where nothing has gone as I planned and I have hit writers block head on. Such is life and thanks for the feedback!
Comment by Pentad on 11 November 2008:

Tim. That made me feel much better..lol. That makes two of us yesterday, on both accounts. Well…the bright side is that it must mean that yesterday was the ‘day once in awhile’ for both of us, so I guess the rest of the week will be rosy!!! Have a great week!
Comment by Chris Edgar on 15 November 2008:

Thanks for this Tim. I have another suggestion re celebrity culture: spend your spare time reading grocery store tabloids about “best and worst celebrity beach bodies” and why Stedman won’t commit to Oprah.