Comments on: Take A Deep Breath http://www.adaringadventure.com/life-coaching/take-a-deep-breath/ Life Coaching with Tim Brownson Wed, 08 Feb 2012 23:43:23 +0000 hourly 1 By: Andy Henry http://www.adaringadventure.com/life-coaching/take-a-deep-breath/#comment-7005 Andy Henry Thu, 23 Apr 2009 08:53:18 +0000 http://www.adaringadventure.com/?p=484#comment-7005 I found your blog on Google. I've bookmarked it and will watch out for your next NLP blog post. I found your blog on Google. I’ve bookmarked it and will watch out for your next NLP blog post.

]]> By: Personal Development Carnival: Issue 41 | The Next 45 Years http://www.adaringadventure.com/life-coaching/take-a-deep-breath/#comment-3413 Personal Development Carnival: Issue 41 | The Next 45 Years Sun, 15 Jun 2008 12:11:40 +0000 http://www.adaringadventure.com/?p=484#comment-3413 [...] Take a Deep Breath by Tim Brownson [...] [...] Take a Deep Breath by Tim Brownson [...]

]]> By: Tim Brownson http://www.adaringadventure.com/life-coaching/take-a-deep-breath/#comment-3289 Tim Brownson Wed, 11 Jun 2008 20:28:06 +0000 http://www.adaringadventure.com/?p=484#comment-3289 A-ha that's what I like to see, some dissent in the ranks! About time too. I think I know where you're coming from and I'd be right there with you if I was talking about failure to describe a person rather than an event. I hate that word in the former context more than I hate the word hate, and I reeeealy hate hate. Firstly, I NEVER said anything about beating ourselves up and council people against that on a regular basis. It's one of the biggest hurdles as a coach I have to overcome. There seems to be a belief that it's not ok to abuse others but it is ok to abuse ourselves. I think that if we don't accept that we make mistakes then we can actually abdicate personal responsibility and just say "Well yeh, that's life, so what?" Most of the greats in society are brilliant at learning from their mistakes and learning really quickly. Looking back and thinking "What did I do wrong, what can I learn from that etc" is not a problem if you accept it as a learning experience and don't sit in a corner for 12 hours sobbing to yourself. The horses ass expression may not be the best, but I will add that there is a world of difference in thinking you acted LIKE a horses ass and thinking you ARE a horses ass. I sometimes act like one, but I don't really think I am one. Thanks for opening it up, I value your opinion. A-ha that’s what I like to see, some dissent in the ranks! About time too.

I think I know where you’re coming from and I’d be right there with you if I was talking about failure to describe a person rather than an event. I hate that word in the former context more than I hate the word hate, and I reeeealy hate hate.

Firstly, I NEVER said anything about beating ourselves up and council people against that on a regular basis. It’s one of the biggest hurdles as a coach I have to overcome. There seems to be a belief that it’s not ok to abuse others but it is ok to abuse ourselves.

I think that if we don’t accept that we make mistakes then we can actually abdicate personal responsibility and just say “Well yeh, that’s life, so what?”

Most of the greats in society are brilliant at learning from their mistakes and learning really quickly. Looking back and thinking “What did I do wrong, what can I learn from that etc” is not a problem if you accept it as a learning experience and don’t sit in a corner for 12 hours sobbing to yourself.

The horses ass expression may not be the best, but I will add that there is a world of difference in thinking you acted LIKE a horses ass and thinking you ARE a horses ass. I sometimes act like one, but I don’t really think I am one.

Thanks for opening it up, I value your opinion.

]]> By: Todd http://www.adaringadventure.com/life-coaching/take-a-deep-breath/#comment-3283 Todd Wed, 11 Jun 2008 19:05:43 +0000 http://www.adaringadventure.com/?p=484#comment-3283 I like your article Tim-- but I don't resonate with the idea that we do things 'wrong' and make 'mistakes'. Once we take these words out of the equation and our language, we just take situations and our actions for what they are-- and we free ourselves up to act from a place of greater wisdom as time goes on. I just never saw the benefit in my own life of beating myself up with analyzing my own mistakes. Focusing on these negative words breeds more of them...and we create habits of acting out of fear of 'not doing that again'. I don't know...I just think language and framing is SO important. I am all about improving myself, and helping others, but I am through thinking of myself as a 'horses ass'...no matter what I do, I accept and move on. Would love to hear your thoughts on this, esp. with your NLP training! Todd I like your article Tim– but I don’t resonate with the idea that we do things ‘wrong’ and make ‘mistakes’. Once we take these words out of the equation and our language, we just take situations and our actions for what they are– and we free ourselves up to act from a place of greater wisdom as time goes on.
I just never saw the benefit in my own life of beating myself up with analyzing my own mistakes. Focusing on these negative words breeds more of them…and we create habits of acting out of fear of ‘not doing that again’. I don’t know…I just think language and framing is SO important. I am all about improving myself, and helping others, but I am through thinking of myself as a ‘horses ass’…no matter what I do, I accept and move on.
Would love to hear your thoughts on this, esp. with your NLP training!
Todd

]]> By: Robert http://www.adaringadventure.com/life-coaching/take-a-deep-breath/#comment-3242 Robert Tue, 10 Jun 2008 11:43:35 +0000 http://www.adaringadventure.com/?p=484#comment-3242 I used to do this all the time, and then over time I gradually did it less and less. I used to feel responsible for everyone's rotten mood. I've gotten better at it by throwing in humor like, "maybe their donut had no jelly in it this morning" OR "their mood is not my fault.... they probably have an extreme case of explosive diarrhea and they are having trouble talking right now". I have a little laugh inside and then carry on. I used to do this all the time, and then over time I gradually did it less and less. I used to feel responsible for everyone’s rotten mood. I’ve gotten better at it by throwing in humor like, “maybe their donut had no jelly in it this morning” OR “their mood is not my fault…. they probably have an extreme case of explosive diarrhea and they are having trouble talking right now”. I have a little laugh inside and then carry on.

]]> By: Tim Brownson http://www.adaringadventure.com/life-coaching/take-a-deep-breath/#comment-3237 Tim Brownson Sun, 08 Jun 2008 17:02:15 +0000 http://www.adaringadventure.com/?p=484#comment-3237 @ Erek - Spot on, I couldn't agree more. Taking that first step of personal responsibility is not always easy though. @ Andrea - I couldn't agree more with you too! I guess I'm just a yes man ;-) Thanks for the comment. @ Erek – Spot on, I couldn’t agree more. Taking that first step of personal responsibility is not always easy though.

@ Andrea – I couldn’t agree more with you too! I guess I’m just a yes man ;-) Thanks for the comment.

]]> By: Andre Hess|Empowered Soul http://www.adaringadventure.com/life-coaching/take-a-deep-breath/#comment-3226 Andre Hess|Empowered Soul Sun, 08 Jun 2008 04:17:37 +0000 http://www.adaringadventure.com/?p=484#comment-3226 Great article! I think it's always interesting, too, to witness our reaction, take that deep breath (always, always good advice) and say: "What does my perspective on this interaction say about me?" After all, the world and the people in it are one big mirror. How we interpret the actions of others can teach us a great deal about ourselves! Instead of "Wow, I wonder what his story is?" we could ask "Wow, I wonder what I can learn about myself from my reaction to this guy." Blessings, Andrea Great article! I think it’s always interesting, too, to witness our reaction, take that deep breath (always, always good advice) and say: “What does my perspective on this interaction say about me?”

After all, the world and the people in it are one big mirror. How we interpret the actions of others can teach us a great deal about ourselves! Instead of “Wow, I wonder what his story is?” we could ask “Wow, I wonder what I can learn about myself from my reaction to this guy.”

Blessings,
Andrea

]]> By: Erek Ostrowski http://www.adaringadventure.com/life-coaching/take-a-deep-breath/#comment-3225 Erek Ostrowski Sun, 08 Jun 2008 00:34:32 +0000 http://www.adaringadventure.com/?p=484#comment-3225 Tim, Thanks for the tips! I think another really useful tack on this is to practice being responsible for the snap judgments we do make. By this, I mean understanding that as human beings, we're constantly judging and assessing everything within our frame of view, and assuming that we will continue to do so! This line of thinking is not a substitute for the tips you suggested...more like a context to operate from. If I take the case that I am predisposed to making snap judgments (by virtue of the fact that I'm human), I'm more likely to catch myself in the act and adjust my attitude! Great post! Erek Tim,

Thanks for the tips!

I think another really useful tack on this is to practice being responsible for the snap judgments we do make. By this, I mean understanding that as human beings, we’re constantly judging and assessing everything within our frame of view, and assuming that we will continue to do so!

This line of thinking is not a substitute for the tips you suggested…more like a context to operate from. If I take the case that I am predisposed to making snap judgments (by virtue of the fact that I’m human), I’m more likely to catch myself in the act and adjust my attitude!

Great post!

Erek

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