Customer Service - T-Mobile Style

Posted on 27 March 2007

It’s funny but every time I ring T-Mobile they start of by telling me when I joined them and how much the value my custom. The fact that if I wasn’t signed into a 2 year contract I would be gone down the road quicker than you can say ‘ for instructions that you have no chance of understanding press 4’ seems of scant regard. I suppose I should have a grudging admiration for their fake it tell you make it style of customer support.

I have to go back to the UK this week and as such I had requested an unblocking code so that I could use my UK SIM card and not have to pay the quite ludicrous 99cents per minute that T-Mobile wanted. They sent me the code but it didn’t work. I was aware that too many attempts and the phone would permanently block so I called in to customer support. The lady took my through the process and at the end we both agreed the code wasn’t working. She offered to request another one but it would take up to 24 hours. It was still 4 or 5 days away from me leaving so I agreed.

The new code was about as useful as the old one when it finally arrived so once again I called in for help. This time I was told that if it didn’t work it must be Nokias fault and I needed to call them. I did as requested only for Nokia to tell me that all phones sold to T-Mobile are done so on an unlocked basis, it was a T-Mobile problem. Once more I toiled through customer support but this time was passed onto Tech Support, Hurray we were getting somewhere! After going through the process again the lady said there was a problem with the phone and that they needed to swap it out. Great I said, could we do it overnight as I am away tomorrow. T-Mobile have no facility to ship overnight it was either 3 day or 7 day. Ok, what if I go into the store then and do it there. That wasn’t possible either it had to be shipped.

So we have hit an impasse. I leave the country tomorrow and have no way of getting a phone that will work with my English SIM card short of going and buying a new one. Therefore, I will have to use my US card and pay the exhorbitant charges. So T-Mobile, don’t have to swap be errant phone over and they get to make more money from me into the bargain. Not bad eh for terrible service, maybe I should try it with my customers and see what happens.

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The Prodigal Client

Posted on 26 March 2007

With new clients I try to make the induction process as easy and risk free as possible. I do not charge for consultations and I only invoice after the first session. This is designed to make sure people are happy with what they are getting themselves into and do not feel pressured into something of which they are unsure about. It works very well and most people respect the way I do it….most of the time.

Then I get days like yesterday. I scheduled in a Sunday afternoon appointment with somebody that preferred to see me at a weekend. I realize that I have to be flexible with clients and do not mind doing this on occasions to help out.

As usual I called to confirm the day before a new appointment and the lady said she would be here as agreed. By the due time of 1.00pm I was prepped up and ready to go but with no client. I give a 15 or 20 minute leeway for first appointments as people need to find me and sometimes it is difficult knowing exactly how long it will take you to get somewhere the first time.

By 1.20pm I was a little edgy and tried to call her but was put straight through to voice mail. I called he home number but it was busy. Ok I thought, maybe she is lost and calling home for help, that’s not a problem, after all, I had nobody else booked in and was only going to spend the rest of the afternoon chilling with my wife. At 1.45pm I finally managed to get to speak to her husband who explained she was out and that I may get her on her cell now. I tried again and it rang this time but no answer and eventually went to voice mail. I left a message and almost immediately she called me back. When I answered and said my name the phone clicked off. So I tried again and got voice mail. By 2.00pm I realized that she wasn’t coming and started to rearrange my plans. I sent an e-mail saying I was sorry we had not got to meet and also left another voice mail message asking her to let me know things were ok.

I have heard nothing since.

I have no I idea why this lady failed to show up or why she didn’t respond to my calls. She may have had a terrible day, some bad news, a huge row with her husband or simply be feeling overwhelmed. Or she may simply be ignorant and not value anybody else’s time but her own. I don’t want to jump to conclusions, I want there to be a logical reason that prevented her from calling me and advising there was a problem and I could say ‘no problem, I understand’ but as time has gone on I am less inclined to believe that.

For an hour or so I stewed and started to think that I need to change my induction process and insist that people mail me a check prior to us setting up a life coaching session. Then I thought a bit more and realized that this is only the second time that this has ever happened and it’s really no big deal in the great scheme of things. When we deal with people we are always going to have small disappointments from time to time and this is simply one of those.

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The Difference Between Life Coaching & Counseling

Posted on 24 March 2007

I often have to explain the difference between coaching and counseling to clients and prospective clients. There are some subtle differences and some fundamental ones. Coaching tends to be less interested in the past than in the future and where the client wants to be when the process is finished. It is also less concerned my how clients feel than how they want to feel. That is not to say that a clients past experiences and feelings are not important just that they cannot be influenced and as such there is less value in working with them.

Another significant difference is that on the whole coaching doesn’t tend to cover as long a period of time. Now this is not always the case but generally speaking it is, I don’t usually see clients for more than 6 – 12 sessions and often a lot less than that. I do some maintenance coaching and even have a coach of my own but it is more for motivational and accountability reasons than trying to do any serious change work. In fact I would go as far as to say I want my clients in and out as quickly as possible and when they leave have them armed with all the tools they need to coach themselves moving forward.

I am not making an argument for or against either process, both have their value in the right circumstances but they are inherently different and if you are considering one over the other it is important to know why.

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Gain A New Perspective

Posted on 22 March 2007

The day after I got back from my vacation I started to feel unwell. It started with a bit of a cough but within 6 or so hours had developed into aching limbs and then dizziness and nausea. By Monday I was almost bed bound and feeling as bad as I have done for years. I rarely get ill, in fact I think I have only had 1 or 2 colds in the last 5 years, so when I do get hit by something a bit more aggressive I invariably turn into a wuss.

This was definitely one of those times. I was trying to keep a positive upbeat attitude but kept slipping back into wussness every time my guard slipped. I was sleeping terribly, not eating and having trouble standing up without feeling dizzy. So I decided to read a book, not a coaching book this time but something not associated with work at all. I had been given Lance Armstrong’s autobiography to read by my sister a few weeks ago and not gotten round to picking it up so I though that this may be a great opportunity.

About 70 or so pages in I started to feel pretty pathetic. Here I was with at worst a case of the flu and acting like I was on deaths door reading about a guy that had been to the proverbial hell and back. For those of you that don’t know, Armstrong had Stage 4 testicular cancer (the worst kind) that had spread to his lungs and brain and was given less than a 20% chance of survival. Not only did he survive, but went on to become the greatest cyclist the planet has even known AFTER he had gone through the removal of a testicle, brain surgery and a brutal chemotherapy regime. That is simply incredible.

I lay there trying to comprehend what this guy went through but not really able to do it and started to feel a little less sorry for myself. Sure I still felt under the weather but when it was put into a proper perspective I realized it was no big deal.

We all want more from life and often have a tendency to think that the grass is greener on the other side but ask yourself this; If you could throw your lot in life into a huge big pot along with everybody else on earth and then draw out somebody else’s at random, would you do it?

After I started writing this I heard the sad news that the sister of a friend of mine has just been diagnosed with cancer. I’m not going to name names but just say my thoughts and best wishes are with her and her family for a speedy full recovery.

 

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What Brings Out The Best In You?

Posted on 18 March 2007

I was on vacation this week in the Caribbean, which is why my Blogs were non-existent. It is the first week away we have had since well before moving to the US and I thought I would give myself a complete break from work and work related issues.

On Monday we were in Jamaica and as we had been there several times before just decided to wander down to some local shops and dispense with venturing any further.

For those of you that have been to Jamaica you will know what a beautiful island it is and also know that the locals are not shy at coming forward! In fact any walk can be a daunting prospect as you run a gauntlet of taxi drivers, hair-braiders and general merchandise sellers all determined to relieve you of as much cash as possible. Unfortunately it often has to be a case of getting your head down and walking as quickly as possible. To be honest on more than one occasion in the past we have felt somewhat threatened and even been physically jostled. Even though it doesn’t seem to be as bad as in previous years chatting to locals is something that it isn’t easy to do without the expectancy that you are going to give them some money.

On the walk back to the ship there were two members of the ships staff in front of us and suddenly one of the guys decides to cross the road at a time when traffic was streaming in both directions. I wasn’t really watching but realized what happened when I heard a thud and looked up to see the guy roll off the car and onto the road. My wife is a nurse and she immediately ran over to tend to him as I called for an ambulance. She checked all his vital signs and whereas he wasn’t at all well he didn’t appear to have any serious injuries. The next 15 minutes or so were chaotic as the police arrived and traffic started to build up in both directions.

The reason I am writing this is that within moments of the accident happening a shift took place amongst the people round and about. Suddenly there was a genuine concern for another human beings life, people that had been busy doing whatever the day required from them were suddenly more concerned about this poor mans welfare than making a few extra dollars. Cars that had been beeping their horns in annoyance when they just thought it was a hold up were suddenly stopping to offer help when they realized the severity of the situation, passers-by were doing likewise and not a single trader was pushing their wares.

It got me wondering why we sometimes need to see misfortune to reach inside and bring out the best on ourselves, why we simply can’t offer such compassion and dare I say it, love, to another human being without first having to see them in trouble or obviously needing help. I have to admit, I have no idea of the answer and I think it is a shame that most of us have a tendency to hide our best side and only allow it out in times of adversity.

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Go With Your Gut Instinct

Posted on 10 March 2007

I found myself working with a client yesterday and referring to the same book for the second time in a week.

I listened to Malcolm Gladwell’ s ‘Blink’ 2 years ago on an unabridged audio book whilst driving from San Francisco to Phoenix; from the very beginning I loved his laid back style of delivery and excellent use of examples from all walks of life including the military, psychology, the emergency services and academia.  ‘Blink’ looks at how we think as humans and comes away with some startling facts and ideas.

The main premise is that the decisions we make in the blink of an eye are frequently more accurate than when we take time the to analyze and sift data. His basic conclusion in that our unconscious mind can process data so fast from so many different sources that it is easy for our conscious mind to disregard what it thinks are snap, uninformed decisions. This is in line with the knowledge that the conscious mind can only deal with 7 + or – 2 pieces of information at once whereas the unconscious mind can do far more than that and is doing so every moment of the day. 

So next time you have a ‘gut’ feeling or something that feels like intuition, maybe it is no such thing, maybe it is a decision that has been made at an unconscious level and that particular part of your mind is trying to give you a signal that it knows what the right thing to do is. You can still disregard it of course and sometimes it may be prudent to do so, but give yourself some credit and realize that even large decisions don’t necessarily need to be ruminated on for days on end once you are in possession of all of the facts.  

 

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Be Your Own Life Coach - Part 2

Posted on 9 March 2007

So here we go with part 2

Write it down– Whether it is goals or simply ideas you have on trying to improve your life put them on paper. The sheer act of writing something down sends a message to the unconscious mind that you are serious about what you are doing that it need to get to work on bridging the gap between where you are now and where you want to go.

Every action has a positive intention - This is another NLP presupposition. Even when we do what sometimes seem like ridiculous things there is always a positive intent behind it. It may take some digging to get to it but it is there. Taking smoking as an example. It can seem self-destructive and often smokers that want to quit will refuse to see the benefits, but they are there. By accepting that your actions are not there to harm you (even self-harm fits into this category) then you can look for alternative ways to get whatever it is you want.

Model – If you are unsure how to do something copy somebody that is proficient. This is how children learn to speak and it is how we get good at something quickly. NLP was based on modeling when Richard Bandler and John Grinder wanted to know how Fritz Perls, Virginia Satir and Milton Erickson got such outstanding results in therapy. So, they modeled them and hey presto! They got good at it too.

Relish making mistakes – Mistakes are feedback, they are nature’s way of telling us we need to adjust to take stock and reconsider. They do not mean we are failure as a person just that we failed at a task.
Don’t beat yourself up – This is so important to get a handle on. There really is no need EVER to beat yourself up, be kind to yourself like you would a loved one. We all make mistakes, even the super successful make mistakes, try and learn from them and move on. Too many people seem to be great at beating themselves up and terrible at praising themselves. Give yourself some credit from time to time, you deserve it!

Coaching yourself is no substitute for hiring an experienced proficient coach but it is certainly better than doing nothing. There are some excellent books out there on self-development and for some fabulous examples look no further than:

 http://www.adaringadventure.com/books-Nightingale-coaching.html

The very best of luck.

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Be Your Own Life Coach - Part 1

Posted on 8 March 2007

I thought I would throw some tips out there in case you that would like to do a bit of self-coaching. It is possible to coach yourself although does require a high level of discipline and more importantly self-awareness. So if you are up for the challenge, here we go:

Know Your Values – Unless you know what your core values are you will struggle with blocks in your life. All our decisions are based around our values and what we consider imperative to our lives. For example, if you have a number one value of integrity and work for a business that rips off its customers (even if you are not involved in the actual process) then you will feel uncomfortable either consciously or unconsciously. There are also away from values, things that we move away from at all costs and again we should know what these are as they can frequently be the reason why we just can’t follow through with things no matter how hard we try.

Accept Beliefs Aren’t Real – Our belief system is something that we have built up over our life. It comes from our parents, our friends, our colleagues and many other sources and is ever changing. We all believed in the tooth fairy at some stage yet now we know that to be a false belief. What false beliefs about your abilities are you holding onto that are holding you back? When you know they are, undermine them, look for counter examples and replace them with more empowering beliefs. After all, if you think you can, you can.

The Map Is Not The Territory – This is a presupposition of NLP and critical to understanding and making changes. Just because we view something one way does not necessarily make it so. Respect other peoples views and opinions as they have their own maps and no one person holds the correct one.

Understand Perceptual Positions – If in moments of introspection you can take a step back and view your life or any given situation from a watchers point of view you will often see things that you can’t see from your angle. It can also be useful to take the 2nd person position, which involves seeing you through the eyes of the person you are talking to or involved with.

Realize Everybody Deletes Information – The human mind can only deal with 7 + or – 2 things at any one time so we have to delete loads of information or we go into sensory overload. Until I just mentioned it you probably weren’t aware of the feeling of your foot on the floor. We are creatures of deletion so try and be aware of what you may be deleting and also those around you.

I will follow up tomorrow with 6 thru 10, in the meantime have fun playing about with these and if you want more information e-mail me through my website.

www.adaringadventure.com

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I’m A Life Coach, This Is What I Do!

Posted on 7 March 2007

I had a call a few weeks ago from a guy that was looking to hire a personal coach to help him over some difficulties with his life. He seemed a really nice and genuine guy but was obviously in a state of overwhelm which is not uncommon in these situations. He had to go out of town for a week and we decided to chat more on his return.

The following week I called him as agreed and he was too busy to talk as he was dealing with the backlog of work that had built up during his trip. So he said he’d follow up later in the week. There is a fine line between hassling people so that they get annoyed with you and want you to leave them alone and leaving them completely alone and looking like you don’t care. As somebody that worked in sales for so long I know this to be true and even with so many years experience I still have difficult striking a balance. I also know that until a client says no to me then I have an element of duty to keep following up because I have no idea what is happening in their personal life, they may not be reading e-mails (or even receiving them), retrieving voice mails or having messages passed on to them. If I have confidence that I can help people (which I do) then I am doing them a disservice by giving up on trying to speak to them before I know (if this is the case) that they do not wish to proceed.

So when I hadn’t heard for a week I called him again. When I finally got to speak to him and he sounded even more troubled than before and told me that he was under too much pressure to deal with a coach at this stage. Now I get this, I really do and he sounds like a really genuine guy, but and it’s a big but, this is what I do! Nobody calls a coach because there life is just perfect and it couldn’t possibly be better, they call because they feel they need a helping hand. 

I hope he does call me back because I can help of that I have no doubt but my gut instinct tells me he wont. Will I call him again if I don’t hear anything? Probably, because I haven’t heard that definitive no yet and at the very least I would like to put him in contact with people that I have coached that were in a similar situation and came through it with flying colors.

 

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Watch Your Thoughts

Posted on 5 March 2007

I don’t know why, whether it is because I am a life coach or because I have some on my website, or simply people can’t think of anything else to ask me but I often get asked what my favorite quote is. The obvious answer would be the Helen Keller quote from which I took my company name. I do indeed love that and it does express the way I would like to live my life. Not necessarily by doing outrageously dangerous things like sky diving or white water rafting (although I would like to try both of those) but tackling the more mundane stuff life throws at us with vigor and enthusiasm. The people I often admire most in life are the ones that are always looking to squeeze even more out of it and go to bed every night knowing that they did their best and had fun in the process.

So after all that, and explaining why I love ‘Life Is Either A Daring Adventure, Or Nothing’ I am now going to say that I have a quote that I actually prefer to that. It is one that I have seen credited to different people but most often Frank Outlaw. It sums up to me as a coach the greatest bit of advice I could ever give a client or anybody for that matter.

Our thoughts are what dictate our lives. Every action we perform starts with a thought and with that thought comes the opportunity to react in any way we want to any given situation. The majority of people do not control their own thoughts; they come and go often without even being noticed. Take the time to monitor yours and what you are saying to yourself, you may be surprised by the results.

Watch your thoughts; they become your words. Watch your words; they become your actions. Watch your actions; they become your habits. Watch your habits; they become your character. Watch your character for it will become your destiny.
Frank Outlaw

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